A photograph of a mural on a wall that reads: “What’s the Point?”

Source: “What’s the point of giving you any more artworks when you don’t understand the ones you’ve got?“ (Bethan Huws), eltercero, Flickr

A good thesis statement makes a good argument. The purpose of the thesis statement is to state your viewpoint about your topic. Remember, you are trying to persuade your reader that your viewpoint is valid. In the introduction section, you read the first paragraph of an essay persuading readers why 16-year olds should vote.

In addition to being argumentative, a good thesis statement will reflect the topic of the paper. Sometimes your teacher will give you a topic, and sometimes you will have to come up with your own topic. Either way, your reader needs to be able to tell by reading your thesis statement what your topic is and what your argument is about that topic.

Let’s do a short exercise to get you into the argumentative frame of mind. Each question below presents a topic and two possible thesis statements. For each topic, choose the thesis statement that makes the best argument.

icon for interactive exercise

1. Topic: Governmental agencies trying to help members become healthier

Thesis A: My local government should ban sugary drinks and candy from all public vending machines.

Correct! This is an argument that reflects the topic.

Thesis B: Adults and children in this country consume too much sugar in their diets, which contributes to health issues.

Try again. This is a statement of fact.

2. Topic: Appropriate toys for small children

Thesis A: Guns are inappropriate toys for young children, who fail to understand the safety issues if they are allowed to play with toy guns.

Correct! This is a true argument that reflects the topic.

Thesis B: My mother’s idea of inappropriate and my idea of inappropriate are two different things.

Try again. This statement is vague and could lead the writer to stray from the topic.

3. Topic: Ways we can reduce our environmental footprint on a daily basis

Thesis A: Every day we do things that cause the environment harm such as polluting our water sources.

Try again. This is a weak argument and mostly a statement of fact. It doesn’t reflect the topic.

Thesis B: By making a few simple changes in our daily routines, we can reduce our environmental impact.

Correct! This reflects the topic and makes a specific argument.

You might have noticed from the exercise that the biggest enemy of the argumentative thesis is a statement of fact. What we mean is this: Students often think they are making an argument when actually they are stating a fact or generally accepted opinion.

When you are revising your thesis, ask yourself if your readers will say, “Well, duh!” or “I already know that!” Yes, your persuasive paper is also an informational text, meaning that in addition to persuading your readers to your point of view, you will also provide them with facts and information that support your point of view; however, your goal is to persuade them through successful argumentation, which means your thesis should be debatable.

Let’s take a closer look at a sentence pair from the exercise you just completed.

Thesis A: Local government should ban sugary drinks and candy from all public vending machines.

Thesis B: Adults and children in this country consume too much sugar in their diets, which contributes to health issues.

Let’s discuss why Thesis A is a better choice than Thesis B. Thesis B takes a position, but it is a proven fact that Americans consume more sugar than we need, and this consumption causes health issues. There isn’t really an argument with Thesis B. However, Thesis A is a specific argument suggesting action that local government could take to limit sugar consumption and help its citizens eat a healthier diet.

A photograph of a candy vending machine that has characterized happy candy cartoon figures on it.

Source: Ocean City 2002 - insanely festive vending machine -
110-1075_IMG, ClintJCL, Flikr

= A photograph of two obese males in a shopping mall. Their faces are not visible.

Source: ObesidadInfantilYAdolescente, Gaulsstin, Wikimedia

Another thing to consider when revising your thesis statement is that the words should and must make your thesis more argumentative. Let’s take another look at Thesis B.

Adults and children in this country consume too much sugar in their diets, which contributes to health issues.

We know from research that we consume more sugar than our bodies need, and that this consumption contributes to health problems such as obesity and diabetes.

If it agrees with the evidence you have presented in your paper, you can easily revise the thesis to make it more argumentative, as shown in the following example:

Adults and children in this country consume too much sugar in their diets, causing health issues, putting a drain on community resources and forcing local governments to look at ways to help make its citizens healthier.

In the next section, we will discuss ways to make your thesis statements stronger by making them specific.